“Twas the Night Before Christmas” Poem from #AgileTD Cabaret Night

unicornAgile Testing Days is oodles of fun, as you know (and if not, why?)

Apart from a tutorial, a lightning talk and a workshop, and a game I ran, I also read a poem at Cabaret Night. I’m a renaisance man, yeah (and so is my daughter who drew the ATD Horror Story Unicorn).

Here it is, in its glorious entirety.

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the shop
No development was stirring, not a single FLOP
Computers were on, screens were alight,
as devs have been staring at them since last night.

The testers were grumbling, “nothing is working.”
The developers answered “well, this isn’t helping”
The business people were almost braindead,
as visions of a post-mortems danced in their head.

A senior dev said to a junior one “son,
have you tried turning it off, and then turning it on?”
The junior said nothing, opened the window
He signaled his mates and then jumped, shouting “YOLO”.

He landed on snow, shouted “A sleigh was approaching!”
Big Boss’s car almost hit him, the tires were screeching.
“Is it ready?” she asked, eyes full of hope.
“99% done.” he said. She lit up a smoke.

She asked everyone to assemble near.
The people were scared, they drew in fear
She quietly said “We did our best
Everybody go home now, we’ll take care of the rest.
of the software after the holiday has passed,
and everybody’s rested and energized. That’s a must.”

The people were silent. No one said nothing.
As they picked up their things, some started laughing.
The big boss looked on, remembering the stuff
she learned at the agile course and practiced enough.

Individuals and interactions, the rest is just noise.
Happy people make good software, that’s the only choice.
A deadline on Christmas is a nice goal, agreed,
but a happy team is a nobler goal indeed.

Twas the night before Christmas
At her home, the Big Boss
sent a final email before signing off.
“Thank you my team for continuouing to fight
Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

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